+ Do you ever wonder what your life looks like through someone else's eyes?
Hi, I'm Int. Age 19 on April. I do love arts and cats. Also a coffee,chocolate chip cookies and Harry Potter obsessed. I blog about what i loved to and sometimes my writing got lost from radar, so if you find it awful that makes your blood boil, just let me know.
blog name: int.co
owner: int.
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Friday, March 17, 2017 at 8:04 AM with 4 comment(s)

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As you guys know and enunciate very well, yesterday mark the long-awaited day of 2016 spm candidates to be receiving their result. It happened a bit late( few days of being postponed) compared to previous year due to several reasons. Becomes a tradition, of course there are those who achieved strings of As, those who scored a so-so result and those who dont really passed the examinations. For sure, the day has been filled with the zest of excitement and a dreadfully sorrow feelings. I used to feel it- just the same way.

Speaking of which, i have a brother(read:adik) who sat for his SPM examination last year, too. Alhamdulillah, he passed for all the 9 subjects he sat for. Tell me, which sister is on cloud of nine other than me. None. I felt so glad that my boy did well for his big exam. Why i looked so jubilant even i just said that he passed, not stating how many As he did grab?  Let me clarify this. To let you know, my brother has only enter secondary school the same year he sat for SPM, exactly 9 months before. He was actually a tahfiz student and just came back from Yemen(he didnt- cant proceed his studies there because there has been a great and serious war between the members of Shiite and Sunni's.) He supposed to study abroad for completely 4 years but only surviving there until the 6th month before the phenomenal situation coerced him and his fellows to get back to Malaysia. As a strong clarification, he has never been exposed to the school subjects and he doesnt even took PT3, increasing the problems he had to face. First, he doesnt own a fix and firm basic of the subjects and second, it was not a common and habitual things for my poor brother to accustom with the terms and the conditions and all of the provided formats.

The fact that time flies, he has to push himself to struggle hustily in order to catch up with the topics. If i were in his shoes, i will just surrender and bye. It is crazy, dude. In this case, I solemnly swear i am no good to be compared to him. He reluctants to just giving up on that, but continued to make it through. He believed that beautiful rainbow will soon appear when the heavy rain stop coming down. Albeit his circumstances cant really guarantee his bright future,he is determined to sit for it. Really proud of you boy.

Now, he can smile broadly and happily as his hardwork has paid off. Achieving a sole A- for Bahasa Malaysia and credit for the rest subjects, cant help, but feeling so grateful. It is beyond our expectation, to be honest. Despite of all the trials and tribulations, he shined bright. Alhamdulillah 'alaa kulli hal wan ni'mah.

*me and my brother*

Also, i would like to wish Happy Birthday to my crazy and pesky mate, Balqis who is turning 19 today. Much love to you. ≧﹏≦

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Tuesday, March 14, 2017 at 11:54 PM with 2 comment(s)

Hello i'm back(i'm not really sure if this is for good or not). Wahh, i really miss to exercising and let my fingers dancing on the keyboard writing good words here. How are you doing guys? Hoping that you are all just as fine as well as i am doing pretty well(maybe) here. >o<
Even if you have to encounter horrible bad days, trust me, they will pass eventually. Sometimes, there are peculiar, unbearable and forlorn
things happening in our daily life  that we dont quite understand and often we keep sighing and non-stop complaining about those unfair condition -"why must me, why not them?". Hm i dont think that i am way eligible to be able to talk about this, but, please, chin up. Every cloud has a silver lining. If you can wait and be truly patience for a little more, absolutely, good things are going to happen soon. Chill guys. Allah doesnt burden one soul beyond that it can bear. ((love)).

Moving on to the title of my post today, i am actually feeling a bit peaky and drawn(but not really) and a slightly feeling of emptiness heol idk man. Or maybe i can consider this as what an unemployed girl should really face. Yes, jobless is my main forte now. I am doing nothing but playing a role as an incompentent bibik (mom's assistant). Guess what, i first thought it is like an easy peasy work as i dont have to go outside, just focusing on the house chores and done. But, my assumption went totally wrong.It ain't easy i tell ya. Been doing the same chores for like everyday is really tiresome *sigh*. Also, i have to take over the duty of ironing my sister's school uniform, my mom and dad's clothes.  EVERYDAY DOING THE SAME THINGS OVER AND OVER MOM CAN I QUIT? ((is this how a querulous person acts?!)) But, apparently, i am far from being good, to be labelled as a diligent and hardworking bibik (thats why i told before i am an incompentent), because, most of the times, i sleep and sleep and sleep untill i cant sober enough. Urgh. I feel so unvigorous lately. I am not saying that helping your parents isnt good for your body energy, as you might end up becoming a drawn-looking person, no i'm not, but maybe because of the lack of experience of spending times at home doing nothing except for the chores- i never have had such a long holiday before, thats why i turned to be like this. I'm sorry mom, i dissapointed you.

Somehow, i really want to get to socialise with the outsiders. Frankly, i rarely go out nowadays. Even jogging, or playing badminton, or cycling(which i used to usually do before) arent my priorities anymore. I prefer to stay inside watching tv or eating. (thats one of the factors of my peaky and tired  body). How i miss school time o(╯□╰)o I used to be very excited to finish my school and have a long holiday, but now HAHAHA.

Guys if you are still studying in school, just endure it, you might craving for its presence and memories later. I'm telling you the truth. Thats what you will be longing for after.

Oh ya, i did watch Reply 1988 and ive  reached 18. There are 2 more ep to go. It is actually a family-comedy drama of 2015. But, i only watched it this year. Mind to check if you still dont watch it. I promise you a very beautifully and unstoppable humors written-script. The ost, also, are so soothing and wonderful. Even the cast members, i'm totally infatuated. 

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Sunday, February 12, 2017 at 8:02 AM with 2 comment(s)

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 Its hard to believe that 2017 has already entering February (past two weeks of this month to be exact) and i still dont paved any ways of my progression either in life or mind. I even missed days(or maybe month) to write/left something here. I was way too busy giving attention to my thoughts that i dont have any time to online here fuhh.
As 2016 has sailed off, i am sure as hell that i have a lot to tell you guys. So, now, i'm gonna make review of my 2016 real quick. This post might be lengthy in words, so if you dont really have interest in reading this, i am pleased to hinder you from being here. #stay away

I started my 2016 by enrolling for STAM (sijil tinggi agama malaysia) and luckily i managed to place my name to study in a high school which is located in Kuala Kubu Bharu. So, this is where i start my journey as pre-U student to finish my diploma crash course. And Alhamdulillah, everything went well. During my earlier year, i went to school by walking with my friends a.k.a beloved housemate( oh yeah, we rented a house as we dont want to stay in the hostel and our parents home is far from the school). We walked back and forth everyday for about two months until one of my friends got her driving license and bring her mom's car to drive to school. Unfortunately, my four friends and i only able to rent that house for 4 months before moving to other house(due to several reasons and some conflicts). This new house consists of 8 members( 6 were Stamians, and the two left were STPM student)


2016 was also a fearful year for me as ive been waiting for my SPM result to be announced. Thank god, i passed it with flying colours. Though i can only make it for 7( i took 9 subjects for my SPM), i think i have managed to push  myself to get string of As. I was really afraid and terrified to look at my slip during the time i want to take it from my teacher because my mind keep telling me that i will(maybe) fail for my Maths(you have no idea indeed how bad and unfriendly i am with this subject) and that i was bloodcurling, but as soon as i venture myself, i was really glad and soooooo relieved to know that i passed for my maths( i hit B), but a bit unhappy feeling appeared as soon as i knew i got only C+ for my Economic. Its ok, self. I calmed my butt even actually it causing me to grief. I later met my juniors, teachers and ex-classmates and take some photos. So, SPM is the ending my high school. I was awarded a certification later for having ge-uwd result in SPM.


2016 is one of the greatest year. I made birthday party( accurately surprise birthday party). First is the b.p for my bestest friend, and the second is for my sisters. I owed big thanks and numerous appreciation to my partner in crime for helping me making it happen(for real). Without you guys, this thing will not get to work organised-ly and smooth. I planned with my friend, Syerbib to organise b.p for Hakimah in Secret Recipe( you have to know that Hakimah's birthday was on January but we only able to celebrate it during March). This happened the next day after i received my SPM result, so i could deal to buy some birthday props with Syerbib.(We cant meet up with Hakimah as she didnt come during that SPM announcement result day and thats bonus for us). So during the incident day, as what my friends and i had planned, we gathered in Aeon Rawang. We soon work and split into two. Syerbib, me and my other friends went directly to SR to book place, order cakes and foods and set the party things-blow balloons and more, while my two other friends persuaded Hakimah to accompany them to withdraw some money, buy some things in Daiso and book cinema tickets (i told her that Syerbib and i want to search for the proper place to eat for lunch and luckily she believed us as it was the right time for us to have a meal). After done settling all the things,(we hid the balloons under the table and stretched our foots to cover them.) i whatsapp-ed my friends telling that we have found the place and even ordered meals. We started to sing birthday song at time they arrived there. Hakimah was shed in tears. Then, she cut the cakes(actually it is just a piece of cake) and we took photos and selfies together. We end our meeting that day by watching Munafik and stepping foot in Popular before going back home.
Second b.p was held on May, for my two sisters. I asked my neighbor (my mega best friend) to hand in help. This time it was a picnic surprise-birthday-party kinda concept, so this benevolent friend of mine told me to just organise it at her house yard which is full of green grass and have such a breathtaking scenery one. I left notes to tell my sisters that they are invited to park(which turns to be Aida's house). I have also asked some help from one my sister's friend to set it. I asked her to wait for me at park and bring her to Aida's. There was nothing to express my feeling other than feeling thankful as it worked well.


I was able to provide some times with my family to bake cookies for Eidul  Fitri. Such a splendid moment i can tell. Never will i forget the feeling of being so thirsty like crazy as the weather was lit hot and we have to hold ourselves from eating and drinking until maghrib. (we baked cookies during fasting month and it was challenging). We made at least two types of cookies but i only captured pictures of this cookie.

I spent my time gathering back with my old classmates/ gang. One of them is my long lost friend, we stop seeing each other's faces back then 3 years ago.  This time we went to Midvalley (literally i never step my foot there for about 10 years and above) so everything looks new and exciting once i reach there. I was dumbfounded for a while when it comes to pray(we need to find a prayer room). We went upstairs and downstairs searching it. Finally, my friend asked one of the people there and she told us where to go. Alhamdulillah.
We watched Fantastic Beasts movie and strolling around the mall. I purchased box of Krispy Kreme (my first time) before went home.


2016 ended my long-awaited day to go to Big Bad Wolf book sale. I went there with my parents and siblings using only public transport haha. We ride train, mrt rapidbus and water taxi. Xie xie mom, xie xie dad. I was elated to know that my parents willing to accompany me to go there, and i certainly couldnt say no as i am having difficulties to make any of my friends lend their time to go there with me. So, i picked and chose any books that i am interested to. Apparently, i spent only RM50+ for my books (the retail price is damn expensive). I can only get one book if i were to buy it in bookstore.

I stayed at my uncle's home in Temerloh for almost one week (i was not alone, my sister was there too). It was great to spend our time there as we do a lot of things and i enjoyed the perks of sleeping, sneaking in the kitchen to eat maggi, riding bicycle, watching k-dramas, shopping together with my cousins. My aunt was so generous that she treated us Sushi King( i tell you this- i never tried it before), brought us to the longest market in South East Asia.  There is one day my uncle brought us to mall and he willingly said that he will treat us one book, just pick whatever you want (oh we went to Popular there). So i decided to pick cupcakes recipe book. Before went home, he treated us Pizza Hut.May Allah bless you dear uncle and aunty.


However, there are always two side to a coin. I still have some bad memories throughout this 2016 year.

-being diagnosed suffering from life-time disease. 
-dealing with numbers of difficulties and trouble to make new friends in new school.
-so stressed with studies (stam and muet in one year)
-went through a serious period pain during the first week of my final exam and my mind was so distracted that i cant even focus. it hurts and i was so sad that i cant answer well for my papers.

and more.

After all, there have been ups and downs during 2016, and it was normal. I can barely do anything except to accept it or complain. I just hope in 2017, i can surround myself with +ve vibes and keep my chin up all day long and able to weigh what is right and what is wrong.

lastly, is it not too late to wish you guys happy new year? eheh.

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